I said I wasn't going to panic.
I yelled at my friends who panicked.
But I am behaving in such un-fabulous fashion right now.
I am not quite panicking yet. But ohhhh I'm on the brink.
I've procrastinated all summer. I actually did stop partying and going out after July 4th... but I don't know what the hell I've been doing for the last 2 weeks.
I haven't been following bar/bris schedule. In fact I've barely looked at it. I just went to lectures and half-assed paid attention all summer. And then I did some practice MBE problems.
Basically I did everything that everyone says not to do. Because I'm a big fucking idiot.
And now, here I am.
And if I fail the bar exam, I have absolutely no one to blame but myself. (at least I said if, and not when)
So here's what I need:
- I need you to tell me about how you never did a practice essay and passed the bar exam.
- I need you to tell me about your friend/spouse/classmate who is a big fucking idiot and passed the bar exam.
- Or how you/your friend didn't study until the week before and never went to barbri and passed the exam.
- I need my dog to stop barfing/diarrhea-ing/bleeding, etc.
- I need to eat something other than sweetarts for dinner.
- Prayers, karmic vibes, love and light, etc.
What I don't need:
- To keep dicking around on the internet.
- To let this near-panic evolve into full-blown panic.
- For someone to comment"you'll be fine" "you'll be great" "you're gonna pass". If you do, I will cut you. (See this post from Thanks, but No Thanks for elaboration.)
*EDITED TO ADD: I feel better just getting this out on "paper". I've made a study schedule for the next 8 days. I chatted with a friend who talked me off the ledge. I am going to get some sleep and wake up tomorrow prepared to tackle the day. Do not call social services on me just yet.