It's day 2 back at school and I've had some random thoughts I'd like to give you 1L's.
Chill the fuck out.
There. I said it.
I feel much better already.
Next up -
STOP crowding and shoving your way into my classroom the second our class is over so you can get in place for your torts class. It's annoying. You're annoying. What's your damn hurry?
And the 1L's that were lined up throughout the entire hallway FORTY MINUTES BEFORE THEIR CONTRACTS CLASS YESTERDAY?!?!?!? I don't even know what to say to you, except GET AHOLD OF YOURSELVES. There are enough seats for everyone, I promise. You don't even know anyone yet, who are you going to try to save a seat for?! I felt like I was going through an obstacle course to get to the bathroom. Totally unnecessary.
Also - Dooney and Bourke is ugly. Stop using it as a school bag. Stop using it ever. Barf.
Your sequined flats are ugly too. Stop wearing them.
And to the 1L boy that is walking around the library in baggy jeans, white sneaks, baggy tshirt, sideways baseball cap, and a FAKE DIAMOND EARRING:
I don't think there is enough room here for me to say what I want to say to you.
Take your earring out. Wear some clothes that fit. You're a big kid now. In three years, you're actually going to be a lawyer. No one (I hope!) is every going to hire you with that shit in your ear. You are not Eminem. You look ridiculous.
Wow, that was pretty snarky, even for me.
I'll finish up with some nice advice:
Just breathe, you'll be fine. Go have a drink, you need it.