A little glimpse into my personal life...

So I don't talk about him much, but be lying if I said that my ex-boyfriend wasn't still a huge part of my life... which is really weird because he's actually not a part of my life anymore. At all. We have not spoken in about 18 months.... he doesn't live in the country anymore, and he's married.
But I'd be lying if I said that I don't still love him, and that he doesn't still consume my thoughts... especially over the last couple weeks.

It's especially hard becuase I know that I still love him, but at the same time I'm like "hello! you're fabulous! and pretty! and his new wife is SO UGLY! and has acne! and you're blonde! and half a lawyer!" ... and yeah, I've read the books... obviously why the hell would I want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with me? Yeah. I get it. But, too bad, I do want to be with him. And I do still love him.

I am constantly over-analyzing the situation. I'm always wondering like "what if we were supposed to be together? What if he IS the one?" but at the same time maybe I just think that because I haven't really dated anyone since him. But.. what if he is the one? And he's married to someone else? But what if their marriage doesn't last? What if he calls me up in 2 years and says he's made the biggest mistake of his life? And then I get a grip and say "Get a grip! He is MARRIED! Who wants to be someone's SECOND wife?! Especially when his first wife is so pathetic and gross?!" (oh, and if you think I'm exaggerating when I say she's pathetic and gross... I can't even begin to describe... home-schooled. no college. NO COLLEGE?! I'm sorry... I'm going to be a lawyer in 18 months, and you dumped me for a girl who didn't even go to an actual HIGH school?! And it's not like she's some hot babe bimbo who works at hooters but she's hot and you're a dude so I get it. Nope. Not like that at all. She's gross. And total Whiskey Tango.

Anyway, this is coming up again because I have a friend in an eerily similar situation to the one between my ex and I.... dated since high school, all through college, he was a college athlete, etc. etc. etc. Even when we would fight... the things we would fight about would be the same. And he broke up with her almost a year ago in exactly the same way, and had a new girlfriend almost immediately (like within 2 weeks) (and this girl is a disgusting skank), and now he lives overseas, etc.... And yesterday, he got engaged to the new girlfriend. Granted, it wasn't as rushed as my ex and his wife (dating within a month, engaged a month after that, married 6 weeks later)... it's still incredibly fast. And we're still SO young....
And I gotta be honest... hearing that he is engaged has hit me like a ton of bricks. Ugh. I feel like it's MY ex getting engaged all over again.

Luckily I think my friend is handling things WAY better than I did, and she actually seems like she's moved on with her life (which is way more than I can say for myself!). I haven't talked to her since the engagement, but I hope she's doing okay with it. She's definitely in my thoughts and prayers tonight... been there, done that. And just because she's handling it better than I did, it doesn't mean she's handling it well!


*E.T.A. - upon re-reading, I have made myself sound like a total pathetic loser. Let me clarify - I was absolutely in love with this guy. He was my first love. We dated for over 5 years. I thought we were getting married. And despite all that, I am still totally awesome and fabulous. Please do not think that I spend all my team sitting around mourning the loss of my married ex-boyfriend. Not hardly! I just still think about him a lot, and find myself wondering "what if?" Totally normal, right?!

Happy First Day of Winter!

Happy First Day of Winter!!!

In case you weren't sure it was winter.... The current temperature in Chicago is -4 degrees. Yes. That's actual temperature. With the wind chill it's like -24 or something else disgusting. What is that all about? I mean, I know that's normal in February... but that's still two months away... two LONG months....
and it was even cold here in my usually warm hometown... what the hell? No me gusta.

Off to shiver under my blankets now....

FINISHEEEEEDDDD!!!

Yay! I am now finished with my third semester of law school.... which makes me 1/2 a lawyer now, right? Haha. Well... halfway done with law school at least... not counting that pesky bar exam.

Speaking of the bar exam... I'm going to need to decide fairly soon where to take it. Siiiiick.

But for now, I survived the semester and am heading home tomorrow to enjoy a relaxing Christmas break with the family. Yay! :)

Poor Kid.

Wow. This poor kid.


"The father of 3-year-old Adolf Hitler Campbell, denied a birthday cake with the child's full name on it by one New Jersey supermarket, is asking for a little tolerance."
....
and...
"There's a new president and he says it's time for a change; well, then it's time for a change," the 35-year-old continued. "They need to accept a name. A name's a name. The kid isn't going to grow up and do what (Hitler) did."

What?! Why in God's name would you name that poor child Adolf Hitler? That poor kid.

3/5

Welp, I've finished three classes for the semester, now 2 left... including my absolute least favorite class of the semester - Property. It has been helllllll. Seriously it is so incredibly boring. And that really bums me out because my friends at other law schools have said they've enjoyed property... Maybe because my teacher is so boring I hate it a lot?

So anyway, after Wednesday, it's all over with... whooohooo!

On an unrelated note - I realize the economy is in the shitter, but really, I can't stop spending money. I swear J.Crew sends me an e-mail every day with another 20% off, free shipping, etc. How am I supposed to study/not spend money with this going on?!

Christmas Party

The law firm I work at is having their Christmas party on Friday. It's at a nice restaurant, so I'm excited for a good free meal.

Today at work, the following conversation took place:

LawyerLady: Are you coming to the party Friday?
Me: Yep!
LawyerLady: Oh good! Are you bringing a significant other?
Me: Nope, I don't have one.
LawyerLady: Oh, why don't you just bring someone?
Me: Ehhh... that's just someone to have to try and entertain for the night.
LawyerLady: Good point. That's kinda how I feel about taking my husband.


Ha. Now - back to studying!

Chugging along...

1 Final and 1 paper down.... 2 finals and 1 take-home final to go. We're getting there....

I will survive...

With Britney's new album Circus as my guiding light, I will survive these finals. Whooo!
I've been listening to it all day as I study, etc... there are a couple dud tracks, but overall, I love it! Her performance on Good Morning America this morning was fairly blah, but I still bought tickets for her show her in Chicago at the end of April! Here's hoping she gets it together by then...
if not, I'm sure we'll still have a great time.
Happy Birthday Britney!

Now, back to studying... boo